When I woke up, I found myself in an unfamiliar room.
The smell of oil filled the air, making it seem like a garage.
Even though I couldn't understand why I woke up in such a place, I closed my eyes again, thinking that some people live in stylish rooms.
I had a headache and felt nauseous.
When I checked my body to ensure I was okay, I found that I was still wearing a camisole and underwear.
There were no signs of having had intercourse, but I felt a vague sense of fatigue.
Although the room was dim, the light coming through the barred window indicated it was around noon.
However, I quickly came to my senses.
It had been years since I woke up in a stranger's house.
I quickly sat up and looked around.
In front of me was a large man I hadn't noticed before.
"Good morning."
"...Good morning."
Relief washed over me instantly.
Waking up in a stranger's room after a night of drinking was a terrifying nightmare.
The man was my childhood friend, James.
He was a man with shoulder-length bleached hair that was quite striking.
"Would you like some coffee? You look terrible."
"Thank you, I was thinking of something scary."
It's not that I dislike him; in fact, I like him, but when I think about seriously dating, getting married, and having children, I feel like I want to avoid romance.
It's funny to think that I look like someone who wouldn't think such things.
I look like a woman who works at night and plays around, and I actually do various part-time jobs, including night work.
Even so, I can't imagine having a one-night stand with a man, and I'm still a virgin.
"I have a headache, but did anything happen yesterday?"
"You were a bit rowdy, but nothing happened."
"What do you mean by that?"
From what I heard, I had called James while drunk and asked him to pick me up from the bar.
I'm not sure why I called James, but the money I earned from my part-time job was still in my bag.
This wasn't the first time I left work like this, but it was the first time I woke up at James's house.
"You should quit working at night. You're not good with alcohol, so it's not for you."
"I will. I'm quitting customer service altogether."
How many times has James lectured me?
He used to be like a girl, but now he's grown into a tall, strong man.
He hasn't told anyone, but he's probably in the "gay" or "drag queen" category.
I've never seen him cross-dress, but since he doesn't do anything to me no matter how I'm dressed, he's definitely gay.
"Mira, I have to get back to work, so change and leave when you're ready."
I wonder what kind of language he uses at work.
He probably doesn't speak in a feminine way at work.
To others, he might look like an ordinary man, but to me, he doesn't seem like a typical man.
Quietly, I picked up the clothes I had probably scattered myself.
Under James's bed, clothes were strewn about, but I couldn't find my bra.
I searched deep under the bed but found nothing resembling clothes.
However, I did find something typically male.
An adult magazine, in this day and age, I was a bit impressed by the analog nature of it.
Since I couldn't find my bra, I casually drank the coffee James brought me and took a breather.
There's no way James would be wearing my bra, and it wouldn't fit him anyway, so I imagined it and burst out laughing.
In the process, I was startled to see if the coffee had splashed onto the adult magazine under the bed, and I hurried to check.
Then I suddenly felt a sense of discomfort.
It was a gravure magazine with women in it, not a gay one.
"Is it for when friends come over?" I wondered as I flipped through the pages.
All the women were in provocative poses, wearing tiny bikinis.
As I flipped through the pages, they were getting closer to being naked.
It was an ordinary, healthy adult magazine.
Come to think of it, I felt like I did something with James yesterday.
I've often blacked out before, and each time James would take me to my room.
A week ago, James was at my place having tea with me.
But I was drinking again in my room.
I wondered what James was doing then.
I was starting to feel guilty for always making him take care of me.
However, if James wasn't gay, then he wasn't seeing me as a woman, which made me seriously worry that I was failing as a woman.
In reality, I was still a virgin, and I thought I should change my attitude and seriously consider what it means.
If I had a bit more allure, maybe things wouldn't have turned out this way.
In the end, I went home without a bra.
On the way, I was lost in thought.
While relaxing in my room, I found an unused condom by the bedside.
When I picked it up, my mind went blank.
There's no way I would have something like this.
Of course, I've never seen or touched one before.
And since I've never had sex, I didn't even know how to react.
I immediately contacted James.
He's the only one who's been in my room, and I hoped it was a mistake.
"James, I need to talk to you. Did I bring some guy into my house?"
"Huh? What are you talking about, idiot?"
James drove over to my house right away.
He looked puzzled but seemed willing to listen.
"This was in my house..."
"That's... something I brought."
My mind went blank.
"Why would you leave it in my room?"
"Because you need it."
I couldn't understand when he decided I needed it, and I opened and closed my mouth without making a sound.
According to him, every time I got drunk, I would end up having sex with James.
"I keep telling you, you always say you want to do it with me, so I buy them at the convenience store every time."
"That's a lie. Prove it. I haven't even had any experience with men."
In the end, even when James touched my body, I had no awareness of it.
It seemed that over the past six months, my relationship with James had changed significantly.
"Do you have any proof?"
"Want to try it?"
Suddenly, James pulled out his erect member and showed it to me.
It was so sudden that I stared blankly, and he began to undress me with practiced hands.
I was in a state where I couldn't resist, just staring at James's large hands.
He pulled down my underwear and rubbed his erect member against my slit.
I was still confused, thinking it might be a joke, but James slowly pushed his "thing" inside me.
It slowly entered, easily fitting inside my vagina.
A sense of discomfort in my vagina hit me all at once.
Despite it being my first time, I felt a strange familiarity with my body's reaction.
I wondered if "the first time" wasn't supposed to be painful even if I was wet.
James's member, hotter than his body temperature, gradually lubricated my vagina with precum.
I was sure it wasn't my own fluids, but I couldn't comprehend it as it was my first time.
Then James began to move his hips slowly.
I wasn't ready, but James was smiling contentedly.
"Are you okay? Can you feel it?"
"I can feel it, but is there anyone who enters without being wet?"
While I was drunk, I had engaged in lewd acts with James multiple times,
and in the end, James had unilaterally declared me his "friend with benefits."
However, I couldn't forgive him for that.
But I could feel my body, which had swallowed his member, gradually secreting fluids as if clinging to James.
When James licked my nipples with his tongue, a dry voice escaped naturally.
The pleasure was overwhelming my mind.
The feeling of doing something forbidden made my face flush.
"I didn't think you had no memory of it. I thought you didn't mind because we always did it."
Now that he mentioned it, I realized I had only been meeting James while drunk recently.
Moreover, every time he picked me up, we would repeat the act in my room.
"How many times has it been?"
"We've done it about 20 times, I think. You always initiated it, but I felt bad, so I always used protection."
"So why are you doing it raw today?"
"Because you remember, and I'll finish outside."
I didn't quite understand the logic, but today was essentially my first experience.
James began to caress my body with practiced hands.
"Mira, you prefer your nipples over your clitoris. You always say it feels best when it's inside."
James knew my body's reactions that I didn't even know.
For some reason, the most sensitive part, my clitoris, was being stimulated by a vibrator that was under the bed.
I wondered when such a thing had been brought into the room.
"You're getting quite wet."
On the bed, our bodies rubbed against each other.
The stimulation to my clitoris felt so good that my hips moved naturally.
As a supposed virgin, I felt like I was possessed by something else, and I couldn't comprehend it.
Not remembering was terrifying.
James sucked on my lips.
I hadn't heard that our bodies were compatible.
I never thought he saw me as a woman.
"Sorry, but I'll use a condom after all."
He suddenly pulled back and began to put on the condom I had been holding earlier.
James's member was coated in sticky fluid.
The hole in me, which had been left open, seemed to be twitching as if seeking something.
James, now wearing a condom, covered me again and resumed the act without any discomfort.
"Did we do it this morning too?"
"We did, but in the car."
I tried to recall, but I still had no memory of it.
I was questioning myself, thinking it was impossible.
And I was seriously wondering how it was possible to do it in a car.
With my "presumed virgin" knowledge of sex, I couldn't fill in the blanks in my memory.
James began to move his hips vigorously, but my body felt no resistance and easily experienced the pleasure of climaxing.
The speed of the thrusts and everything else was perfectly compatible.
I was so embarrassed that I couldn't even look at James's face as I naturally let out moans.
After James finished, he began to stir inside me with his fingers.
"What?!"
"Mira, you enjoy being teased after it's over."
A dry voice escaped.
I felt like I was going crazy.
James's long fingers were repeatedly entering and exiting in place of his member.
"It would be better if you were a bit more sensitive."
James was smiling without any remorse.
I felt like my body had been thoroughly researched, and I had come to terms with it.
"From now on, I think I can develop you more when you're aware."
Later, I found my bra under the back seat of James's car.
Fin.
